I’m embarrassed to admit that I’ve allowed my inner critic to kill most of my dreams. I’ve always had this toxic voice in my head preventing me from living my life fully. Like most people, I’ve always had dreams that excited and inspired me. Yet this inner critic robbed every chance I’ve had by reminding me that I’m simply not good enough. Logically I know, that people can do just about anything, yet fear keeps me from taking chances.
I used to be super athletic as a child, even outperforming boys at just about everything. I was swift and confident and it served me well. However, when I reached high school, I lost that confidence. And all that confidence I had was now replaced with an overwhelming fear of making a fool of myself.
My high school was more like a college in the fact that it was a diverse melting pot. Kids from all over NYC and the boroughs were all mixed together on one campus yet we didn’t know each other prior to that. The grammar school I came from had no physical education program. So now I was thrown into a pool of kids who had the benefit of amazing athletics programs. They knew every sport and the rules as well. I on the other hand was lost.
This once athletic dynamo got on the basketball court and had no idea what to do – in my eyes, it was like sending me to play with the Harlem Globe Trotters.
I had the greatest friends. Friends who didn’t care if I could play or not. They knew I could learn, and wanted me to be a part of the game, yet my voice screamed “You will cause them to lose. Don’t play.” As the years went on, I declined to play sports more and more. Which in turn made me enjoy life less and less. Wow – it makes me sad just thinking about it.
It’s sad what those voices cause and even sadder that they never stopped. So, WTF do we do? I guess we finally FIGHT BACK and try each day to go one step further past our fears or you will remember that basketball court 50-60 years later and feel bad about your choices.
Anyone out there who can tell me what they do to silence the voices please WRITE NOW.